Tears in Heaven
by TsutsuiKimihiro
Summary: A story about the relationship between Fuji and Tezuka. Starts off angsty, COMPLETE. TezukaxFuji
1. Angst, pure angst

"Tears in Heaven" By Tsutsui Kimihiro

Disclaimer: Prince of Tennis is not mine, of course, and neither is the song " Tears in Heaven" by Eric Clapton.

Would you know my name  
If I saw you in heaven?  
Would you feel the same  
If I saw you in heaven?  
I must be strong and carry on  
'Cause I know I don't belong here in heaven

Shuusuke Fuji knew as soon as he glanced out that window that he would have given his immortal soul to take it back, to not have looked, or even to have looked a few seconds earlier or later. But even so, his vacant expression didn't change. He showed no reaction to what he saw out there at all, but inside he felt as if he were dying, and he couldn't breath., however, he would never allow himself to be so outspoken with is feelings, to be under-mined with such petty emotions when it was usually so easy to cover them up and conceal them. Nether-the-less, he couldn't pretend they didn't exist at all, he knew that so well that it hurt him sometimes. In fact, he was hurt now, but Fuji didn't say anything. He didn't cry, or cough from the sudden lack of oxygen. (He had hyperventilated.) 

He simply turned back to his work and concentrated on the book in front of him, although it took a few moments until the Kanji became syllables again, and those syllables became words and those words became sentences and even longer before he was able to make himself concentrate hard enough to comprehend it. It occurred to him that he had been on the same page for the last ten or so minutes so he quickly flipped the page. He wouldn't allow himself to appear so distant and out of it. He had an image to uphold, after all. But even so, the image in his mind didn't go away no matter how long he distracted himself from it. It was burned into his mind and it hurt worse than any injury he could have suffered from playing tennis.

Tezuka, outside…walking side by side ( not holding hands, however, because Tezuka Kunimitsu had an image to uphold as well) with her. Fuji hated her, mostly because he couldn't bring himself to hate Tezuka, no matter how much he wanted to. She and Fuji took second block together, and that was the time when he found it hardest to act as if everything was ok. When she smiled, or laughed or talked casually to her friends, he hated her even more. He hated her the most when she talked about Tezuka, about how handsome and kind he was. About when he had taken her to the various places they went on dates, about how Tezuka had remembered her birthday and what she had picked out as a gift for his birthday and how she hoped that they would be able to spend New Years together and most of all about how happy she was. Fuji simply hated her with a burning passion. He wanted to hate Tezuka the same way, because it would be such a relief from loving him so much that he cared. Tezuka had never gone on dates with Fuji, which was ok because they understood each other. They had, however, planned to spend New Year's together. Everything had been like a dream, up until one month ago.

Would you hold my hand  
If I saw you in heaven?  
Would you help me stand  
If I saw you in heaven?  
I'll find my way through night and day  
'Cause I know I just can't stay here in heaven  
A month ago Tezuka had said that he and Fuji couldn't be together anymore. That was the only time Fuji had cried, and it hadn't been in front of Tezuka. He had calmly waited until he was home, and even then he had made sure that Yuuta wouldn't know. When Tezuka said that they had no future together, that was the first time that he felt that he couldn't breath, that his feelings were out of control. He had barely been able to speak, and he couldn't think. His feelings for Tezuka had been strong, and Tezuka had returned them. Why now? Why? 

" We have no future together, Fuji-kun." Fuji? Only yesterday he had called him Shuusuke, and he had called Tezuka Kunimitsu. How could everything be erased so easily? Those were the thoughts that Fuji couldn't erase from his mind, he could only push them back for a short while.

Time can bring you down, time can bend your knees  
Time can break your heart, have you begging please, beggin please

And then he had started dating her. Someone he had a future with, someone who wasn't a boy. Sure, she was pretty and smart and perfect ( As Fuji thought this, he angrily turned the page in his book, almost ripping it and Eiji looked at him carefully, Fuji turned to him and smiled, and Eiji looked satisfied and went back to his own work. That was good, it gave Fuji a moment to relax and get a hold of himself.) Back to the self-loathing, because however much he hated her, he hated himself more.

Beyond the door there's peace I'm sure  
And I know there'll be no more tears in heaven

End.

Authors note: I know I know, it's so short! I worked more on the general quality of the story than I did the length. Obviously it is about Fuji's feelings about Tezuka leaving him, and his feelings about Tezuka's new girlfriend. I wrote this fic because at the time, my own girlfriend had just broken up with me and a short time later I found out she was going out with someone else, even though she led me on and acted like she still liked me. I will probably continue this fic for atleast one or two more chapters.


	2. Tezuka's point of view, as if anyone car...

"Tears in Heaven" by Tsutsui Kimihiro 

Disclaimer: (Insert a clever little disclaimer here)

A/N : Thank-you for all the reviews I have received. In actuality, it's hard for me to continue stories with no feedback, and I've received more feedback for this story than any of my other fics in the first 24 hours. ( Probably because Prince of Tennis is a popular anime and category.) Anyway, this chapter will mostly be about Tezuka and in the next chapter maybe something will happen. ( I will abide by my pg13 rating, but since I am a shonen-ai writer…I'm not going to disappoint you. ^ ^ ) Anyway, this a/n is getting a big long so I'll stop being so egotistical and write the fucking story already.

Tezuka was bored and quite frankly annoyed, which was a very poor combination for him, in his opinion. He found himself mostly staring at his brown, patent leather school shoes as he walked (which were also very boring, seeing as how almost every male student at SHS wore the same type of brown, patent leather school shoes) and thought about tennis. About tennis practice that afternoon, and about their training schedule and about Fuji Shuusuke. ( In strictly a tennis coach manner, however, because Tezuka was very determined not to allow himself to think of Fuji Shuusuke in any other way other than as his tennis coach recently.) 

However, lately he couldn't even truthfully say that he thought of him as a tennis coach thinks of any good player, because Fuji had quit the tennis club. He had waited until their last big tournament was over for the year, but still, it had been very sudden. He hadn't discussed it with anyone before, but he had obviously had it planned for some while before he actually did it. In fact, he had waited exactly 3 weeks, Tezuka regrettably assumed. 3 weeks after they had broken up. Every time Tezuka thought of it, he felt a tightness in his chest. He hated that, and he often saw Fuji walking home from school ( alone, since most of his friends were at the said club) while practice carried on and more often or not, he felt the urge to call out of him to join them, or to run 20 laps, to just look at him and acknowledge that he was there. Mostly the latter. Instead, he had to settle for second-rate reports from Eiji and other team members who occasionally saw Fuji in class or (rarely) outside of school. Eiji's reports were usually uninformative, but that was who saw the most of Fuji, besides his brother, Yuuta. 

" Eh? Fuji…We study together after school sometimes. He seems normal to me." And that's how it was. Fuji ignored Tezuka, and acted like everything was normal, minus tennis. Tezuka couldn't complain, not with the circumstances. He had ended it violently with Fuji, then betrayed him further when he'd gotten a girlfriend. Of all of this, he was aware.

It wasn't that he was a bad person, but perhaps that he thought way to much, and said way to little and did half as much as he thought ( Or half as much as he thought he did, but it wasn't really that relevant.) His whole relationship with Fuji had been really fulfilling and all of that, but it didn't seem like a real relationship.

No that this did either.

Which brought him back to the present.

She wasn't a bad person, he knew, just a bit…annoying, un-Fuji like, and he had to admit that they had very little in common as well. She talked continuously, and that was difficult for Tezuka, because although he rarely had anything to say to her, he didn't want to listen to her drag on and on incessantly. In truth, he longed to break up with her every time that they were forced to spend more than ten minutes alone together. The problem was that he needed her to distract him from Fuji. Of course he still loved him! ( Duh..) But it couldn't be a real sort of love, could it? Not between two men, certainly not. He truly only wanted Fuji to be happy, minus Tezuka. (But then again, wasn't that love in its purest form? Duh…) It didn't seem like Fuji had reached any sort of Nirvana in the month that they had been separated, but it didn't seem as if he was affected very deeply from what Eiji and others said. He was the typical, prodigious Fuji Shuusuke. Quiet and thoughtful and above all, cold. (And in Tezuka's mind, above that: perfect 10.) 

" Tezuka? Oi, Tezuka, are you listening?" Space in. She was talking to him. ( Again…he sighed)

" Hm." He turned to look at her. She wasn't ugly at all, in fact, he was sure that she could be considered beautiful.

" I said that Fuji Shuusuke is a very cruel person, don't you think?" Tezuka's heart skipped a beat. He gulped and adjusted his glasses.

" Hm."

" Just today I was talking to a girlfriend before class, and he sits just behind her, when I mentioned you. He swiped all his books to the floor and walked out as if it was nothing! He didn't return until the class was almost finished! Does he have something against you?" Tezuka blinked. 

" Tennis…club…" He finally managed to stammer.

" Oh? Well he certainly took us by surprise. He's usually so calm and collected. Maybe the two of your should make amends. I don't like to admit it, but Fuji is a very scary person when he's like that." Tezuka could have cried. A month of listening, and this was the most inquisitive news he had received about Fuji the whole time, from her. FROM HER!!! Life was cruel and ironic. She must have noticed a change in his expression, but she didn't say anything. 

FROM HER!!!

He walked her the few blocks home in silence after that, and after she had bid him adieu and was was gone, he slowly began to walk in the direction of his own house. The tightness and compression he had occasionally felt in his chest was there, and it wasn't going away anytime soon, it seemed. He had only gotten a girlfriend to help him forget about Fuji, yet he had realized how selfish that really was, which was probably even more selfish than anything. That suddenly dawned on him, with all the gentleness of a baseball bat. How stupid had he been? Even if he didn't think he could l-o-v-e Fuji, that didn't give him the right to toy with some innocent girl's fragile emotions. Even if it was to late for him, he had to make things right before he hurt someone else. Tezuka knew what he had to do. He suddenly stopped, turned around, walked back to his girlfriend's house, and promptly broke up with her. (BASTARD.)

And that was how all the girls in the school learned this golden rule: NEVER mention Fuji Shuusuke to Tezuka Kunimitsu.

End.

a/n This is getting a little Seuss-ish…I think that this story is taking a turn for the funny. Maybe I'll change the genre then. This is so much fun to write, even if it is stupid and pointless. ( Well…that is what yaoi means after all…yama nashi, ochi nashi, imi nashi, an acrynym for" No point, no climax" which is basically how all my yaoi-paired stories basically are, pointless.) Thanks for reading this far…


	3. long chapter, Inui gets FREAKY in Fuji's...

" Tears in Heaven" part 3, by Tsutsui Kimihiro

Disclaimer: I don't own Prince of Tennis.

A/N: The third and final chapter. Woo! This was intended to be funny, and fuck ic because in actuality, how do we know how the characters of Tennis no Ojisama would act if these things actually happened to them? I think this is fine how it is. Let the senseless violence and girly drama ensue!

Word spread fast in Seigaku High School. After all, Tezuka was a popular guy. Fuji knew the next day during first block from Eiji who had morning practice with the other Seigaku regulars. (minus Fuji, of course) He found out again, from Tezuka's now ex-girlfriend later, at the start second block. It wasn't the best or most gratifying formal meeting he had ever had, to say the least…

" Hajmemoshite."

He nodded, trying not to look her in the eyes. For the past few weeks, after all, she had been his object of un-tamed, burning flaming passionate hate. The kind of hate that made men cry and brought kings to their knees. The kind of hate that had made his hazel eyes turn green and his brown hair turn blonde…and this was tennis prodigy Fuji Shuusuke we were talking about.

" My name is Wakimiya Chiharu."

He nodded, extending his right hand. His face was eerily blank and his rigid mind appeared to be somewhere else.

" Fuji Shuusuke…desu…" And then it hit him. Actually, Wakimiya hit him. Hard. Really hard. He fell back onto one of the 22 steel desks placed in rows around the classroom, which fell over and left him sprawled on the white tile floor, then she calmly walked away. Probably to the office, where their sensei was screaming at her to go. 

He put a hand up to his nose, it was really bleeding and he thought it might be broken. That hurts! Wow, he thought, trying to catch the red liquid as it seeped down his face. He didn't want it in his mouth or anything, Christ. There was a lot of it. This was the historic moment when Shuusuke Fuji lost his fucking mind. Students would talk about it for years and thus a school legend was born. He thought of this, and he couldn't act casual anymore, he just couldn't. 

He wished he had been born a girl. If he was a girl, Tezuka could have stayed with him unconditionally. If he was a girl, he could have hit Wakimiya back, but then the thought of him as a girl, and amidst the blood and gawking classmates, he started laughing. Fuji stood up, and found that he couldn't stop it. He laughed until he couldn't breath and tears were rolling down his face, mixing with the blood, which had stained his white dress shirt for school to a point where it was soon going to be his red dress shirt for school as he gasped for breath, his stomach aching and finally the hysteric laughing began to become sobs. Soon, he was just crying and not laughing at all, and he couldn't stop that any better than he had stopped the laughing. Yeah, Fuji was definitely breaking down. I'm definitely breaking down, he thought to himself. 

The students around him looked nervous. They glanced sideways at each other for some sort of mental support. Fuji Shuusuke was a scary guy, it seemed.

The teacher gently grabbed the arm that he wasn't hiding his bloody broken nose with and pulled him out of the hushed classroom, toward the nurses office. The only thing going through his head at that point was that he was sorry that he was getting blood on the floor. He pulled away from her when they passed the principal and bowed.

" Blood on the floor…I'm very sorry." He bowed again, bloody and practically sobbing incessantly. The principal blinked.

In the end, he ended up leaving the school in an ambulance. Tezuka sure knew how to pick' em, he thought as a paramedic handed him a towel and told him to try and catch some of that blood while the teacher frantically explained what had happened.

By the end of third block, half the school knew about the love triangle between Tezuka Kunimitsu, Wakimiya Chiharu and Fuji Shuusuke and then about Fuji Shuusuke's total breakdown. ( Maybe he's on drugs? They speculated) That half included most of the Seigaku regulars, and Tezuka found himself at a loss as he himself heard what had happened during second block, room 401.

" Oi, Tezuka! Did that girl really break up with you for Fuji? I heard that he turned her down and then she broke his nose! Ha ha." Eiji said after school. Tezuka blinked.

Why did things always turn out like this?!

Fuji was released from the hospital about half an hour after arriving. By this time, he had a terrible headache and his nose was bruised and sore. He was given some pain relievers by the doctor and he took them willingly and Eiji, Momoshiro, Oichi, Inui ( He brought some of his special Inui Remix Juice, affectionately, to cheer him up) and Kaidou, came to visit him after school. All the regulars, minus Tezuka. Eiji and Momoshiro got right down to the point.

" So did you really turn her down? And she broke your nose!?" Fuji blinked.

" Was that what Tezuka said?" He inquired. What exactly WAS he supposed to say? Yuuta hadn't asked…but everyone else would wonder…

" Un, Tezuka wouldn't tell anyone anything, he was in a wicked bad mood today. Practice was hostile." Momoshiro said, wincing and rubbing a sore leg.

" So you quit the tennis club because you and Tezuka were fighting over a girl?" Kaidou asked, narrowing his eyes as if it was the stupidest thing he had ever heard. Fuji opened his mouth to say something, but stopped. He realized that even if he never said anything, everyone would assume something. The truth didn't matter. He looked down.

" Sorry." Kaidou hissed. Inui looked at Fuji, regular squinty-eyed Fuji, plus the broken nose. Nothing seemed to be different, but there was something wrong that only Inui, who had watched all of the regulars with almost unhealthy interest since they had first begun to play together four years ago could see. He knew more about them than he assumed that they did, and even though Fuji put on a good act, that was all it was. 

" So now that this girl is out of the picture, then you should be able to play now." Eiji said thoughtfully. Fuji wished it was that simple, but he couldn't really believe that it would ever be. Part of him wanted to act like that was all that it had been, two boys fighting over a girl, but it hadn't. It had been a boy and a girl fighting over a boy, and the girl had won in more ways than one. Those were the facts. He wasn't about to let some rumor change things, no matter how simple it seemed.

" I don't think so…" Oichi furrowed his eyebrows. This sucked, but they couldn't force Fuji to play if he obviously wasn't going to. He seemed pretty in control. Even though his nose was purple and bruised, Fuji was Fuji, and Oichi knew that he had a lot more going on in his head than he let on. But that was his business, not Oichi's. 

They chatted for another twenty minutes, and slowly the visitors began to leave. Finally, it was just him and Inui. ( @ @) They sat in silence for a few minutes, and finally Fuji spoke, because he didn't think that Inui had any plans to leave soon and the silence between them was a little un-nerving.

" So what did you put in it this time?" He asked, holding up a water-bottle filled with the seemingly deadly remix juice. Inui's glasses shown for a moment, and he grinned evilly.

" Don't worry, it's very healthy." Fuji smiled kindly and uncapped it, taking a long sip of the green-brown liquid. He licked his lips.

" Wow, this is really good!" He took another drink and finished it in one gulp, " Thanks!" Inui nodded and flipped open his notebook, making a note. Fuji smiled. Inui flipped back the pages in his notebook suddenly and started reading sporadic notes, translating his own shorthand and not looking up until he finished. Fuji froze.

" Wednesday, February 8th, Tezuka and Fuji leave school together. Thursday, February 9th, Tennis practice, 3:40-5:00, Tezuka and Fuji leave together and go to Fuji's house. They stay there until Yuuta arrives at exactly 8:10 p.m. Friday night, Tezuka and Fuji make plans to see a movie. Fuji takes one tablespoon of cough syrup, half the regular dosage, and an aspirin. They meet at the movies at exactly 7:45 p.m. They leave and go to Tezuka's house, Fuji stays at Tezuka's house and they leave together at 6:15 a.m. the next morning. They arrive at school at 6:35..." It went on in a similar fashion, and it wasn't just this year that he had a record of, Fuji knew, but all the years that they had known each other. Inui knew everything. ( Law # 2: Inui Sadaharu rules the universe.) Fuji's eyes were open now, things were getting serious. 

" I don't know what you're getting at, Inui." He said, his face expressionless.

" You know exactly what I'm getting at, Fuji. It wasn't a girl that liked you better than him that you fought over, that you quit the team over. It had nothing to do with her. It only had to do with yourself and Tezuka. " Fuji narrowed his eyes, so similar an expression that he could have been smiling, but he wasn't. This was the prodigy in his most dangerous of moods.

" Why are you saying this? Why does it matter?" Inui crossed his arms and leaned back in the chair he was sitting in.

" Maybe it doesn't, but even so, I think that it does to you." (This sounds like blackmail!!) Fuji shrugged and looked away.

" So what? It's over now. It's the past." 

" I just want you to confirm my accusation, that's all." Fuji's gaze met his.

" And what is that?" Inui grinned and adjusted his square framed glasses.

" You and Tezuka were carrying on an elicit affair, unbeknownst to everyone. You were secretly lovers, but something happened between the two of you, and your affair ended. Tezuka started dating someone else, and yesterday afternoon they broke up. She seemed to think that you had something to do with that." Fuji was frozen. Inui made it sound so obvious, as if anyone could come to the same conclusion.

" You didn't tell anyone did you?" Fuji knew he hadn't. He hadn't.

" It's none of my business what the two of you do in your spare time, but it's affecting the team. It affected your playing after you split up, and it's affecting Tezuka's still."

" So what's your point?"

" I don't have one. That's just my accusation. Do you agree or disagree that what I've said is true?" He asked, leaning over toward Fuji in anticipation of the answer.

" It's true," Inui nodded as if to say, of course it is, " Let me see your notebook…" Fuji said, smiling. Inui grinned.

" No way, but if my accusations are correct…" The doorbell rang, " Then that should be Tezuka, coming over to talk." ^ ^ Fuji blinked, then jumped up and ran to the window, cracking the blinds to look outside to the porch.

" I-Inui!!" Fuji faltered.

" I told you so…" He smiled genuinely, because he had never heard of Fuji faltering in anything and this was like a ray of hope in a totally predictable world.

" Inui!!" 

" You don't have to thank me…"

" INUI."

" What?"

" HIDE." 

" Oh…" He glanced around, and decided on an ideal hiding spot. This was difficult, because of his height, but he'd settled on the closet. He stepped inside, ducking his head and closed the door until it was open just a crack, so he could see out. He quietly pulled out his digital camera and started recording…since he couldn't very well write in the dark. Fuji blinked and when he saw that Inui was out of sight, he cautiously approached the door to open it to Tezuka, who rang the doorbell again. Fuji nervously unlatched the chain lock on the door and wondered why he was acting like this. It was idiotic! He was Fuji after all…Not Yuuta. Sheesh. He cracked the door open and looked out cautiously.

" Yes?" He asked. Tezuka had one hand up as if he were about to knock on the door. He immediately put it down.

" Can I come in?" He asked, looking down to Fuji's one visible eye. In the few seconds between the question and the answer, Fuji thought about saying no. He thought about closing the door and locking it and going to his room and laying down under the covers and ignoring Tezuka. He thought of telling Tezuka that he couldn't' come in because he was with Inui now. ( Which wasn't exactly a lie…he WAS with Inui…in the same room…) He thought about it, but in the end, he took one careful step back and opened the front door, allowing Tezuka to enter.

Tezuka walked into the front hall and looked around, as if perhaps Fuji's house had changed since he'd last been there and Fuji invited him out of the hallway and to sit down in the living room. Tezuka slipped off his shoes and went to the living room and sat. Fuji asked him if he'd like a glass of tea. He'd accepted. With or without sugar? Without. A cup or a glass? A cup…Green tea or mint? Mint…Hot or cold?

"FUJI." Fuji gulped and took a deep breath.

" Hai, Tezuka?" He answered, setting the tea tray down on the table in the living room. He was trying very hard to act natural, maybe a little to natural…Tezuka sounded annoyed. 

" We need to talk." Fuji served the tea, being careful not to spill it, which was hard because if he had allowed his hands to shake, they would have been. 

" Hm?" He didn't bring his gaze up to meet Tezuka's. He was afraid of what he might find there.

" Please look at me Fuji…Shuusuke…" His heart skipped a beat and he forced himself to look at Tezuka, " I'm sorry," Fuji's eyes opened, " I did a very terrible thing to you, and I just wanted you to know that." Fuji set the tea pot down and rested his arms by his side. He felt numb and unconnected to reality. Tezuka leaned over the table and reached out, grasping Fuji's left arm, " I'm begging for your forgiveness." Fuji didn't look at him. He couldn't. After this month of pure hell, after all the shit he had went through…He was thinking, can I forgive him? Suddenly, he looked up and into Tezuka's dark, deep eyes.

Of course he could. Fuji rose up to Tezuka's level, slightly standing on his knees. He slowly closed his eyes and kissed Tezuka gently. Tezuka responded by tilting Fuji's chin with his free hand, but when he did, Fuji's nose bumped Tezuka's chin and Fuji pulled back in surprise.

" Ow." He laughed, Tezuka smiled and everything was ok. Fuji kissed Tezuka again and he knew that every time, everything would be ok. He would love Tezuka unconditionally. He smiled and Tezuka looked at him with immense wonder.

Inui continued to video tape them ( Hey! This was great stuff!), feeling quite pleased with himself. He decided that he would sneak out when they decided to move things to the bedroom…or when Yuuta got home. Yep, life was good.

When Yuuta got home later that night, he went to the closet to hang up his jacket. Boy was he surprised. Inui stared down at him, a strange grin on his face. Yuuta screamed and slammed the door shut, locking it from the outside.

" SHUUSUKE!!!"

End.

A/N: Wow, that was a long chapter. How Inui got dragged into this, we'll never know. For a few sentences there, it looked like this fic was going to take a trip to the twilight zone and become an InuixFuji fic. Anyway, this fic started out so depressing, it really curved, huh? Well, I hope you liked my first Tennis no Ojisama fic. If you liked it, I have other Hikaru no Go fics that are just as lame as this fic is, maybe even lamer! If you are just a bored person, go here: www.blackpolaris.tk

"Not all who wander are lost."-J.R.R. Tolkien 


End file.
